Genuinely curious how much housing being a 'safe bet' is just population growth. Japan's housing market collapsed as birth rates fell - makes you wonder what could happen elsewhere as demographics shift! Thanks for this!
I feel this so deeply. It's been on my mind constantly for the past few years.
I'm 33 and just bought my apartment this year after years of wanting to but not having enough for all the upfront fees. The situation in Amsterdam sounds very similar to what you are describing. The daycare fees are what I find insane. Not only you need to have all the money to afford a larger home for the kid(s) but then you also need to pay 2000+ monthly to send your kid to daycare while you work to be able to afford your home. I don't know how parents do it.
Omg, I know!? I honestly find it so hard to get my head around the fact that, for many, it’s better value for money to not work and look after your child full-time than to send them to daycare??
Yes I know right! It's a forced comeback to the stay at home parent model. But on the other hands it's also hard to afford anything on one salary. Most of my friends with kids ended up moving away from big cities to make it work. I hope something happens to break the crazy cycle we're in at least for the next generations.
Oh Alanna, I relate to this sooo heavily. At 24 (almost 25) I haven't got many "when are you going to start a family?" questions yet, but we get a LOT about when we're going to get engaged/married. We currently rent and my response is ALWAYS: "we don't want to spend a house deposit for the sake of a day". The stability to have our own roof over our heads is so much more important to us!
Honestly!! There’s almost nothing I want more than my own place these days, it offers more stability and comfort than any wedding day could! Keep saving for that house, girl! You can get married any time xx
Married one year and to everyone who asks about babies I say, I’d like a second bedroom first. I live in Southern California and it’s sad that I’m not actually scared to be a mum, I’m scared to afford a baby. Thank you for this 🖤
And the need to earn that high income doesn't go away once you have the house and child. Linking to my latest post, about a couple that has two kids and neither wants to be the breadwinner:
Life can throw you curveballs and plans can bottom out, but you do have to have something in mind before you have a child, because the income problem is permanent. And I'm sure you're right: You would be a great mother!
Aw, thank you Rachel! Yes, I can imagine it’s a constant worry. I’m also learning that careers aren’t linear in the way that we’re always taught. You expect to only get richer and richer in life as you climb the corporate ladder, but that’s not how the world works!
Didn't work that way for me! And a big reason why is that climbing that ladder requires consistent focus, and my life kept interfering with my ability to do that.
But from where I sit right now (newly retired), it worked out, and I wouldn't change a thing.
I empathise with this so much!! Especially the part about not even being a huge consumer of “things” but STILL feeling like I can’t treat myself when I want to. Everything has to be planned and reviewed. It’s such a myth that younger generations are out here spending all their income on avocado toast and constant small luxuries—but perhaps it alleviates some kind of guilt from older generations to feel that way about us!
As someone who is constantly having to explain that “we just can’t afford to right now” to aching family members, this hit.
It’s really frustrating isn’t it? Especially when it’s older family members asking, like things are NOT what they were in your day 😂
Init. Trying being a modern woman, Barbara.
😂😂😂
Genuinely curious how much housing being a 'safe bet' is just population growth. Japan's housing market collapsed as birth rates fell - makes you wonder what could happen elsewhere as demographics shift! Thanks for this!
It’s so interesting to learn about how they might be connected, isn’t it?? Glad you liked the piece!
I feel this so deeply. It's been on my mind constantly for the past few years.
I'm 33 and just bought my apartment this year after years of wanting to but not having enough for all the upfront fees. The situation in Amsterdam sounds very similar to what you are describing. The daycare fees are what I find insane. Not only you need to have all the money to afford a larger home for the kid(s) but then you also need to pay 2000+ monthly to send your kid to daycare while you work to be able to afford your home. I don't know how parents do it.
Omg, I know!? I honestly find it so hard to get my head around the fact that, for many, it’s better value for money to not work and look after your child full-time than to send them to daycare??
Yes I know right! It's a forced comeback to the stay at home parent model. But on the other hands it's also hard to afford anything on one salary. Most of my friends with kids ended up moving away from big cities to make it work. I hope something happens to break the crazy cycle we're in at least for the next generations.
Oh Alanna, I relate to this sooo heavily. At 24 (almost 25) I haven't got many "when are you going to start a family?" questions yet, but we get a LOT about when we're going to get engaged/married. We currently rent and my response is ALWAYS: "we don't want to spend a house deposit for the sake of a day". The stability to have our own roof over our heads is so much more important to us!
Honestly!! There’s almost nothing I want more than my own place these days, it offers more stability and comfort than any wedding day could! Keep saving for that house, girl! You can get married any time xx
Married one year and to everyone who asks about babies I say, I’d like a second bedroom first. I live in Southern California and it’s sad that I’m not actually scared to be a mum, I’m scared to afford a baby. Thank you for this 🖤
Honestly! You shouldn’t have to give up all your space and money to have a baby—it just shouldn’t have to be that way?? I’m glad you liked the piece 😊
Alanna, this is poignant, I'm so sorry.
And the need to earn that high income doesn't go away once you have the house and child. Linking to my latest post, about a couple that has two kids and neither wants to be the breadwinner:
https://adviceobsessed.substack.com/p/neither-spouse-wants-to-work-again.
Life can throw you curveballs and plans can bottom out, but you do have to have something in mind before you have a child, because the income problem is permanent. And I'm sure you're right: You would be a great mother!
Aw, thank you Rachel! Yes, I can imagine it’s a constant worry. I’m also learning that careers aren’t linear in the way that we’re always taught. You expect to only get richer and richer in life as you climb the corporate ladder, but that’s not how the world works!
Didn't work that way for me! And a big reason why is that climbing that ladder requires consistent focus, and my life kept interfering with my ability to do that.
But from where I sit right now (newly retired), it worked out, and I wouldn't change a thing.
I empathise with this so much!! Especially the part about not even being a huge consumer of “things” but STILL feeling like I can’t treat myself when I want to. Everything has to be planned and reviewed. It’s such a myth that younger generations are out here spending all their income on avocado toast and constant small luxuries—but perhaps it alleviates some kind of guilt from older generations to feel that way about us!