Are celebrities monopolising fiction?

And if there are only so many seats at the table, are they pushing out better, underrepresented voices?

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From left to right: Zoella, Jeremy Vine, Millie Bobby Brown, David Walliams, Tom Fletcher.

If you walk into any Waterstones here in the UK, the children’s section is like a who’s who of C-list celebrities. David Walliams. Tom Fletcher. Geri Halliwell. Alesha Dixon. Fearne Cotton. Clearly, there’s a thirst for fiction written by people we already know who started out doing something very different, but what is this thirst for celeb writing doing to us, both intellectually and culturally? 

Are celebrities creative or cultured enough to write good fiction? 

I don’t have children, but it runs in my family to have quite strong opinions on the world of children’s entertainment. As the great-niece of Oliver Postgate - creator of Bagpuss, The Clangers and Noggin the Nog - I was brought up with the idea that children can handle much deeper, darker and more creative themes than we give them credit for. In Oliver’s shows, we frequently had to hide behind the sofa or peer through our fingers to endure some of his more sinister characters, or hold in tears during the achingly sad parts. He had a unique aptitude for storytelling and wasn’t in the least bit worried about making these stories palatable for children. Ironically, this made them some of the best children’s shows of all time. 

Jumping back to fiction, and most celebrity children’s books are pretty low-brow. Tom Fletcher has a whole series about a dinosaur that shits out various things. David Walliams has a book that involves a child picking an adult’s nose. I understand that these books are meant to be funny (and I don’t doubt that kids find them so!) but I don’t necessarily trust these singers, presenters and - in the case of David Walliams - vile racists, to deliver really compelling stories. Maybe I’m biased, but from the perspective of a child, I’d prefer to be challenged or changed through storytelling, rather than disgusted. 

And what of celebs that use ghostwriters for fiction? 

In the world of adult fiction, celebrities are taking credit for books they didn’t touch at all. Stranger Things actor, Millie Bobby Brown, caused a stir when her debut fiction novel, Nineteen Steps, was entirely written by ghostwriter, Kathleen McGurl. Despite the front cover bearing her name, Millie admitted that she merely “had a couple of Zoom calls” with Kathleen, who then went on the write the book herself. In a way, you have to commend Millie for her transparency. Many MANY more authors simply won’t admit that the work isn’t theirs. For example, YouTuber Zoella landed herself in hot water back in 2014 for using a ghostwriter to write her book Girl Online. When it came out that Zoella (Zoe Sugg) hadn’t written the book herself, many of her fans felt cheated. Zoella has since published more novels, but with her ghostwriter’s name alongside. 

Millie Bobby Brown and her ghostwriter Kathleen McGurl

Ghostwriting can work for memoirs, but why ghostwrite fiction? 

It makes sense that a celebrity with a compelling life story might partner up with a writer to tell that story in a way that’s readable, stylish and turns pages. In these instances, after all, it’s mostly the lived experience that’s important. It’s not necessary for Britney Spears to pull a paragraph together the way that Sally Rooney can, because we just want to know the bare bones of what happened. Celebrity fiction writing, on the other hand, doesn’t make the same sense to me. 

With so many talented emerging writers out there, why are we salivating at the mouth to buy a book “written” by a child star? Why are we so compelled to read fictional crime by Radio 2 presenter Jeremy Vine? I always imagined that - unlike the music or entertainment world - literary prowess rose above the need to visualise the author. As long as the writing is good, what does it matter if the author is commercially unknown? It’s just ink on the page.  

Maybe I’m a snob…

…and if you’re a long-standing reader of this newsletter, you’ll know I’m not a big fan of celebrities full stop. But there are only so many spots available for new book signings. If we fill these with half-arsed celebrity fiction, what will become of our aptitude for reading, or our future literary canon? How many life-changing, underrepresented stories will go unread because another C-list celebrity has churned out a fictional bestseller to line their already silky pockets?  

At the end of the day, it’s adults buying the books. I’m sure the children don’t care whether their picture book is written by someone famous—but clearly their parents do. And while it might not seem like much of a big deal to buy celebrity fiction, there is a sinister monopoly at play. The rich and famous already manipulate our media and politics, cause a shit-ton more damage to the planet and cause detrimental effects on body image and self-esteem.

Let’s not make it so easy for them to co-opt our fiction, too.

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